Tuesday, September 20, 2011

memory never matches reality

This last week I've been in Colorado visiting my girlfriend/family, and it's been interesting (to say the least) getting away from the computer for a bit. P90x got put on hold while I scrambled to keep up with both work and a new social life, but after writing enough code that my manic quest to finish a certain allotment was appeased, I felt comfortable getting back into it. Moved up 5 lbs in the arm exercises, which is definitely feeling good today.

Without a pole in my living room, I had to go down to Oasis and use theirs... it was so strange being back.

Denver is... exactly how I remembered, and nothing like it. Maybe I've gotten used to suburbia... but I was really on my guard the whole time. At one point some guy in a white car slowed down to follow me on the street... fortunately I was by my car, so I ducked in through the passenger side and he drove off. I'm guessing that means he wasn't after my parking spot.

The city is just... vibrant, diverse, and filthy. Gigantic and tiny. I passionately love, and hate it. Walked by one old job (impossible pictures, where I did CG) and flipped it off on the way to my other old job, where I used to teach pole dancing. It smelled the same... the sweet scent of hookah that reminds me of lip gloss... but the lights were all on, and it seemed to have lost a bit of it's magic. The poles were stuffed in the back room, and we had to look all over to find the rubber foot pads. The classes had been discontinued... apparently the girl I left in charge did not keep up on marketing. I felt a little sad about that, but am not surprised. Most of my regulars were waitresses who worked with her... and I doubted they would have wanted to continue with someone they saw as an equal.

Practicing there was so reminiscent, in the strangest ways. I used to just hole up in that upstairs room, close the gate on the stairwell, and dance for hours, trying to find myself. I had just been through a divorce, and (at the time) felt so lost. It's funny... they still had the CD I left in the player. This song that used to mean so much is now just a nice melody.